I recently realised that although I have come a long away since my abuse, I was still carrying it in someway, its hard to explain as I thought I had healed, but I realised that I was still living in the past I couldn’t allow myself to be happy I was constantly thinking about what could go wrong instead of thinking of what could go right, I can’t remember the last time I was just happy and grateful that I made it through, I’m here to tell my story, I’m here to live another day. I am fed up feeling anxious about my future and upset over my past, its time to let that bullshit go and just live in the present and put my energy into me, to be the person I know I can be.
I think I found it hard as the narcissist always kept me down and never allowed me to grow up, I wasn’t allowed independence or to have an opinion on the things that mattered to me most, now is the time for me to grow up I take full responsibility for my past it was me who put me in this situation and it was me who got me out of it, now it’s time to forget it, he has no hold over me anymore or control all he can do is lie and manipulate, and I can keep spreading my truth or I can just let it go and be grateful that I’m nothing like him. They say the abused become the abuser that is not true, it is a choice that we all have it can either make us bitter or make us better, I choose to be better!!